We all have an inner critic.
Sometimes it quietly whispers, “I should have done better.”
Other times, especially when we're stressed or overwhelmed, it can become very loud:
“I always mess things up.”
“Why can't I get it together?”
“I'm not good enough.”
The challenge isn't necessarily to stop these thoughts from showing up. It's learning not to automatically believe everything our inner critic tells us.
🌸 Try the Mindful Pause
The next time you notice a critical thought, try these four steps:
STOP — Pause and take a breath.
NOTICE — What exactly am I saying to myself?
QUESTION — Is this a fact, or is this my inner critic speaking?
Is there another way I could look at this?
CHOOSE — What would be a more realistic and helpful response?
You don't have to replace a negative thought with forced positivity. Sometimes a more balanced thought is enough:
“I'm struggling today, but that doesn't mean I'm failing.”
“I made a mistake, but I can learn from it.”
“I'm feeling overwhelmed right now. I don't have to figure everything out at once.”
And then ask yourself:
“What do I actually need right now?”
Maybe it's a break. Maybe it's support, a boundary, a conversation, or simply taking one small step forward.
Mindfulness isn't about having perfectly positive thoughts.
Sometimes it's simply noticing:
“There's that critical voice again. I don't have to follow it.”
Then gently choosing what comes next. 💙
This Monday's invitation:
Pause. Notice. Question. Choose.
And if you'd like to explore your own inner critic more deeply, use the Mindful Monday Companion Worksheet to work through a thought and practice responding to yourself differently.
FREE WORKSHEET: https://docs.google.com/document/d/1h-cmx2iVnGebOMMm_yzxUKmUyB7zSQ-D/edit?usp=sharing&ouid=105405856565902070418&rtpof=true&sd=true
— Lisa Deighton Psychotherapy
Therapy can be more than talk